Saturday, August 20, 2011


This is by far the sexiest music video I have ever seen.  RIP Tupac.

Monday, June 13, 2011

Marsha Ambrosius, Late Nights and Early Mornings

Great message to empower sisters and get them to make the  brothers wrap it up.  Safe sex is definitely the best sexual encounter two can share. I love the fact that Black music is not bashful about expressing the natural pleasures of the flesh but for too long it has been the bump and grind aspect that gets promoted.  It is refreshing to see a mature and wise take on having sex.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Why Am I Still Single?

I contemplate the possibility of a long life as a single black woman.  At the age of 12 I imagined myself married with children by the time I reached 25.  What killed the dream?  I am a college educated black woman over 35 who avoided walking down the aisle.  Yes I had a child out of wedlock, so my stock went down, but I was in my late thirties when that happened. I should have been married way before that, right?   It has been a constant journey to discover whether or not I am the reason I am not married.  Subconsciously is it possible that I remained single because I fear that type of commitment that warrants someone to say 'til death do us part"?  Or did I cancel myself out of the game by decisions and choices I made over the years?  There is a chance I am just another statistic the media loves these days, the undesirable black woman destined to be all alone.   A recent article by a non-black website pretty much told black women if you want to get hitched you better start chasing down white men. The jury is still out on that, but I do know there are at least five possibilities why I may remain perpetually unwed.   

1. Failed to Search for a Husband in College.
I am a firm believer that every woman has a period I call, Her Pretty Years.  It falls somewhere between 17 years old to about 25.  I know women are beautiful at all stages of their lives, but pretty years are something different.  It is when our features are softer, we are more hopeful about the future and most of all we appear more attractive to single virile men. I had four solid years to find a potential mate amongst the young unattached men roaming my campus. It was the perfect environment to discover a young man that had not accumulated any emotional baggage yet.  Silly me I went to school got an education, partied a bit, but failed to enter into a serious relationship.   Big mistake if you envisioned tying the knot in your future. 

2.  Remained in New York City
The best place in the world to be a single woman is an overpopulated metropolitan city.  You are surrounded by people just like you. Single men are everywhere vying for your attention.  You don't feel odd when you socialize because it is the norm for people to ride solo.  If you had to tough it out in the suburbs or more family friendly neighborhoods then you might get the urge to jump that broom.  I should have headed to a little town nestled in the south.  It would have driven me crazy as boredom set in, but I would have been highly motivated to tie the knot.

3.  Single Girlfriends
I can count the number of girlfriends who have invited me to weddings over the years on one hand and still have at least three fingers left over.  For some reason I have gravitated to friendships with women who remain perpetually single. Maybe if I went to a slew of weddings and got recruited as a bridesmaid a few times, I may have been motivated walk down the aisle myself.  Besides a wedding was probably a great place to meet single men.

4. Didn't Date Enough
Yes I was single, but I would meet a guy and hang out with him exclusively for a little while.  It makes more sense to juggle three or four men at a time.  Of course you are not giving up the goodies to any of them at this point.  Well maybe the finest one. Dating a variety of men at once probably allows you to evaluate what you are looking for and what you are not.  Instead of eating one entree I should have got on the buffet line and sampled a little bit of everything.

5. Delusions of Grandeur
For some reason I believed that a dark knight would rescue me from singledom and carry me off into the sunset of marital bliss.  It could have been all those frivolous Harlequin romance novels I devoured in junior high school or maybe I am just a romantic at heart.   I failed to realize that some girls have to work at finding a mate.  He will not fall into your lap; you must devise a plan and stick to it.

So here I am a single mom with no prospects on the horizon.  Am I miserable? No but if I do find love, and he gets on one bended knee and I say yes; I could live with that.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

The Ultimate Love: Barack and Michelle

Wedding Bliss
The election of the first Black American president still resonates with me.  The nostalgia has not worn off even two years after Barack Obama's immensely historical inauguration. I still pinch myself when I think damn my President is Black.  What gets me even more emotional is that woman by his side.  The baddest and most amazing FLOTUS this world has seen, Mrs Michelle Obama.  If a man is as strong as the woman at his side, President Obama can move mountains.  What a dynamic regal couple the two of them make.  I love the photo of them in the early days, Michelle holding on tightly to her man, their future unknown but bright nonetheless.

They are the sexiest couple that has lived within the walls of the White House.  I am not trying to be disrespectful but I know that if the walls of the Presidential bedroom could talk it would speak of unbridled passion.  What woman would not want their man to gaze lovingly at them the way Barack vibes on Michelle.  I love to watch him as he admires his woman with the fierce natural curves that only a sister has. She stands beside him, the leader of the Free World,  her vivacious personality never overshadowed or compromised.  Barack and Michelle have the ultimate love thing going on.

Friday, January 7, 2011

Ride Or Die Sisters

Recently TI and his beloved wife, Tiny were in the news because she decided to relieve him of some penal (or penile, however you look at it) stress, by giving him a hand job in the visiting area of the prison that TI currently calls home.  There are probably some people  that totally disapprove of  such a public display of affection, but under the circumstances she was meeting her husband's needs.  How can you be angry at that? With all the statistics out there that have practically doomed the Black relationship, it warms my heart to see a sister doing what she has to just to comfort her man.  Black women can please their men.  No one loves a man as hard and as intensely as we do.  We are ride or die chicks.  When we find a brother we want to be with and he returns the love, there is nothing we wouldn't do for him, within reason of course.  Here are my top five ride or die sisters. These women exemplify what it means to stand by your man at all costs. Anyone who says Black women  are not loyal or loving are full of it.

5.  Tiny  -- Not much left to be said.  Waits patiently for her man each time he gets in trouble with the law.  Put her career on the back burner for his. I could go on.  She is definitely the better half of the Bonnie and Clyde of  Hip Hop (sorry Beyonce and Jay Z).

4   Winnie Mandela-- Her man Nelson was locked up for like 25 years and she fought tooth and nail to get him out of there and to keep his name on people's tongues and in their hearts.  She was quite successful at  mobilizing an army of followers and well we all no what happened.  Sadly the marriage fell apart not too long after Nelson Mandela's release from prison.  You might speculate that she grew accustomed to being the head of the household and a fierce leader in her own right, so it wasn't so easy to take the back seat.  Anyway she proudly held things down while he was imprisoned and should be commended for that.

3.  Whitney Houston --  She and her Bobby were quite an amusing couple.  Being Bobby Brown is my all time favorite reality show ever.  You could not fake that stuff if you wanted to.  Who could also forget all those times Bobby was released from jail and Whitney was outside the gate anticipating the return of her man.  That video of her running barefoot through the parking lot and into the arms of her baby is priceless.  I shed a tear when they broke up.

2.  Coretta Scott King-- She stood by Martin despite the danger those crazy segregationist could have caused her young family.  I mean Martin gave away his winnings from the Nobel Peace Prize and I am sure they could have used the money.  Did Coretta fret, no she rode out the storm.  After his death she held the family together and never remarried, keeping his memory alive.  Now I am not sure if she didn't have a boyfriend hidden somewhere (at least I hope she did) but she was the most dedicated widow I have ever seen.

1.  Michelle Obama --  An intelligent ivy league educated attorney who could probably run the White House herself but chose to put her career aside and  support her man during a campaign that in the beginning seemed impossible.  She makes the President look better in my eyes. 


Since some of the fucked-up world changes that occurred in 2017, I have not been inspired to write anything.  Until now.  Black Panther p...